Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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