How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
