I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
