And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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