so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
