Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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