If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
