I think I am morally bankrupt
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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