This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
