Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
