I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
