i permit you to call me
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
