I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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