I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
