What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
