i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
