Porn is love you can see.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
