You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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