It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
