sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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