I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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