I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Randomize
