I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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