Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
All I want is dick and wine.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
