Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
