Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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