I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
