Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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