I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
