That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
