I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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