sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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