Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize