Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
me + whiskey = a bad person
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
