he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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