goodnight i made you a song goodbye
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
