dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
