Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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