that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize