I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Randomize
