If i come over, it means nothing
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
she told me i tasted like america
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
BRING THE BAGELS
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
