I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
