Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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