Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize