2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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