There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
It's just like the Real World with babies
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
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