Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
