woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
