Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
