Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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